The 306WD donut machines....
Taco Tim's Accord
Vehicle Rated Performance Specifications:
  • Radiator: DOA.
  • ABS system: Tim (needs upgrading).
  • Lighting system: analogous to Popeye
  • Bumper height obviously a bit too low.
  • 0-60 time: 35 seconds (pulled behind a tow truck).
  • Chevy Lumina kill attempts to date: 1.

Taco Tim's Accord just recently met its match with a bad ass piece of "Detroit Iron." It came out of the tumble on the loosing side. Tim's owes his latest body work styling to his dandy tires and Houghton's wonderful Douglass Ave. snow and ice clearing handiness.

MK's Neon (decaf)
Vehicle Rated Performance Specifications:
  • E-brake power: sufficient.
  • Weight of garbage in car: >19.3 lbs.
  • Candlepower: 1,000,000,000 micro lumens.
  • Max SPL output of "Hi": -30 dB
  • 0-60 time: .15 minutes.
  • Snowbank kills to date: 4.
MK won the Most-Effort-To-Look-Mean-In-A-Happy-Neon award 2 years running. Despite driving one of the happiest cars on the planet MK looks like a grumpy lumber jack. MK's other car is a HEV, "because chicks dig HEV's."
Bob's Talon
Vehicle Rated Performance Specifications:
  • E-brake: not used, power to rear wheels sufficient for donut pleasure.
  • Probability of grinding 2nd gear: >%50.
  • Brakes: totally unpredictable ABS (accelerating brake slippage).
  • Shifter linkage: magnesium, titanium, and aluminum composite
  • 0-60 time: quick (on snow, pending successful 2nd gear shift).
  • Snowbank kills to date: 7.
Bob is a big believer in F=ma, especially the m part. All unnecessary safety and convenience items have been removed to sqeeze out that extra 1/80th gallon/year in fuel economy. " It's all about saving the environment," says Bob.
Ryan's Escort
Vehicle Rated Performance Specifications:
  • Est. E-brake life: 2 months max.
  • Common rear tire slip angles: >45 deg.
  • Est. front tire life: <10000 miles.
  • Brakes: good enough to talegate anything anytime on any surface.
  • 0-60 time: 3.2 seconds (off a cliff).
  • Snowbank kills to date: 23.
Ryan's E-brake skill and grace are unrivaled. Ryan's Automotive Tech Tip: Those unsightly body work dimples cause by snow banks and donuts-gone-bad can be removed using a basic turd plunger.